My first true girlfriend

I met her the first day she came to IPC. She was about as shy as I. I didn't make her swoon with my charms, not deliberately. In fact, I was barely aware of her in a lot of ways. I was and still am the type or wonder aimlessly from room to room. I wont take notice of those around me. I didn't take notice of her following me. Not until she confronted me in a stairwell one evening, asking me why I was avoiding her. After that, we went out and played some pool at a local bar. We had some drinks and we kept playing and talking. I didn't really think of her as my girlfriend, just a friend. It wasn't until this little girl from the eastern block teased me on a trip to an art museum about how I am now in a relationship. That took me back a bit. The pool games continued, but we also sat in front of the fire place after we came back. The relationship grew from there, my first relationship as an adult. It wasn't without its rough spot though. I never successfully got her to go on a picnic with me. It was always one or another reason she couldn't. I at one point did start to doubt her and I should have taken that doubt more seriously than I did. It actually heralded a pattern for the remainder of the relationship.

In the fog of infatuation and lust, you will easily loose your way and assume what you shouldn't. We both committed that sin and others paid the price with us. When I moved to Næstved, waiting for the next school to start, I kept in contact with her over SMSs. I would often forget to tell her when I would go out sailing though and I would loose reception for my mobile telephone. Days would go by where she couldn't get in touch with me and she panicked that I had left her. I would use a number of messages to assure her that it was not true. I didn't have a wandering eye like most can have and I was faithful to her.

Relationships can be tricky to figure out. I still haven't figured out the one I am in now and still don't know if continuing it is a good idea or not. I have my insecurities and concerns over what our relationship will be like ten years from now. I have plans to return to Chicago. What about her? Will our relationship turn out like the one I grew up with between my mom and dad? Will we grow old together and be happy? Or will we go our separate ways?

Between Kalø and moving up to the Faroe Islands, we both have been a bit selfish. There are two sides to everything that has happened and between her and I, it is a question about how we will move forward and if we can move forward at all, not a question of who was right and who was wrong.

- Servus